Polygamy means a system of marriage
whereby one person has more than one spouse.
Polygamy can be of two types. One is polygamy where a man marries more
than one woman, and the other is polyandry, where a woman marries more
than one man. In Islam, limited polygamy (up till four wives) is
permitted; whereas polyandry is completely prohibited.
Qur’an is the only religion on the face of the earth that allows men
having up till four wives, Allah says in the Holy Qur'an:
"Marry women of your choice, two, or three, or four; but if you fear
that you shall not be able to deal justly (with them), then only one."
Al-Qur’an (4:3)
Before the Qur’an was revealed, there was no upper limit for polygamy
and many men had many wives, some even hundreds. Islam put an upper
limit of four wives. Islam gives a man permission to marry two, three or
four women, only on the condition that he deals justly with them.
So, Islam came to control having an infinite number of wives, like it
was during the Pre-Islamic era.
In the same chapter Allah says in Surah Nisa verse 129, Allah says:
"You will never be able to be fair and just among women (wives)...."
Qur’an (4:129)
Hence, Islam does allow having more than one wife, yet it has set
conditions for that, which is that the husband should be fair with all
his wives, and treat them equally, which is very difficult.
Multiple marriages lay a heavy responsibility on men, which is why Allah
allowed having more than one wife only if the husband treats his wives
equally. If a man has more than one wife, he must treat them all in an
equal manner, emotionally and financially. For example, he has to
provide separate living accommodation for each of his wives.
Since it is very difficult to be just with all wives, in practice, most
of the Muslim men do not have more than one wife.
Therefore polygyny is not a rule or an order but an exception. Many
people are under the misconception that it is compulsory for a Muslim
man to have more than one wife.
The reason for multiple wives in Islam was not to satisfy men’s desire
and that's it, but for the welfare of the widows and the orphans of the
wars. During war times, many women are unable to find husbands, and they
might prefer to be a co-wife than no wife.
Also allowing multiple marriages is useful in case a man's wife is
sterilized and can't give him the chance of being a father; here he has
the right to marry another wife, and leaving the choice to her whether
she wants to continue being his wife if he marries another woman or not
However men are prohibited from cheating on their wives, meaning a man
can't marry another woman without the knowledge of his wife. He should
tell her, for she might refuse such situation, and in this case it's
totally her right if she asked for divorce.
In the pre-Islamic period, men used to have many wives.
One person had 11 wives and when he converted to Islam, he asked Prophet
Mohammad (pbuh): "What should I do with my wives?"
Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) replied:
"Divorce the all except four."
When non-Muslims hear about Prophet Mohammad’s multiple wives, they
might conclude without much thought that he was a sensuous man. But the
truth is that Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) was married to only one woman,
Khadijah. He remained devoted to her from age 24 to 50. Only after her
death, did the Prophet marry other women. The reason behind the Prophet
(PBUH) marrying more than one wife was to spread Islam, and help the
Islamic message to reach out to the world.
It is obvious that if he was after physical pleasure, he didn’t have to
wait until he was more than fifty years old to start marrying other
wives. His later marriages were for various reasons, some marriages were
with the view to help widows whose husbands had been killed for the sake
of Islam, others were to cement relationships with devoted followers
like Abu Bakr Al-Sadeeq, may Allah be pleased with him. Some of his
marriages were to build strong relations with various tribes that were
at war with Muslims. In brief, Prophet Mohammad’s marriages always had
Islamic motives.
Some of the non-Muslims misunderstand polygamy
and claim that it is one of the negative aspects of Islam, but in fact
Islam sought to control and regulate the number of wives rather than
give free license. And the permission given to men to have more than one
wife is controlled with the conditions Allah has set before marrying
another wife.